Tree Clearing

Tree Clearing

There are two birch trees near the hammock that are dead and need to be cut down. David and John are agreed that any successful plan to remove these trees will involve two essential elements.

1) Beer.

2) Paul. To wit, in some circumstance of imminent peril, possibly on top of a long extension ladder with a chain saw, or holding a rope and pulling the tree in the direction we want it to fall, while others cut it down.

Any additional suggestions will be appreciated.

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July 31, 2006

Actually, there are - or were - three trees that were dead and needed to be removed. While at the cottage I noticed that one of the trees which held one end of the swings near the barbeque was also dead. In fact, it had essentially already succumbed to gravity and was only upright because some other tree's branches were providing it with physical - rather than moral - support. Since this tree was within an eyelash of the Colbourn's property line and a stack of construction materials they have lining the fence, my mouth watered at the chance to do some damage.

The experience was enlightening especially with regard to future tree cutting. In this case I cut through the tree at about shoulder level, then smacked the trunk with a sledge hammer. This is good practice; don't you always see pictures of real lumber jacks hitting trees with sledge hammers?

Anyway, the tree came down exactly the same height as the saw cut and remained standing, only about five feet shorter than it was. The rest of trunk lay across my feet. So I went through the same process again and the tree went exactly where I, at least publicly, didn't want it to go. The video will appear on America's Funniest Home Videos in the coming months. I jumped around like a cricket on a griddle as the tree dropped from it's perch, then did a perfect swan dive across the fence and into the pile of whatever tubes, wood and metal the Colbourns hold precious.

Would have taken a stick of dynamite to cause any harm to the Colbourn's property though, so no (significant) damage done.

I will have ideas on what to do with the other trees once we have picked up the beer. - John